I was quite ill this past January. I was barely able to walk due to my arthritis. I remember being helped into my apartment one day (there was no other way I could get in). The person helping me into the house wondered why I could be in such a good mood. Why wasn't I mad? Why wasn't I blaming God or the fates, or karma, or some cosmic force? I didn't answer them mainly because I was so busy concentrating trying to make my way up to my room. In thinkng about it though, I was quite sure that my condition wasn't permanent. I was sure that others had it worse off then me. In spite of my momentary problems, I knew that I was blessed (I was not suffering alone- I had family to take care of me, I am lucky enough to live in Canada where there is generally good quality health care that does not bankrupt my family. I could be angry about my ill health, or I could be relatively in a good mood and be in ill health. So I chose the latter. I chose to face my ailment good naturedly and not by anger. It did not mean I suffered less. It just meant that I was not quite so miserable.
Now sometimes it is a good thing to lose one's temper. Sometimes it is the only way to get action. However I never feel good when I lose my temper. I always feel bad about it afterwards. I always find that giving someone a piece of my mind is never fully satisfying. I think that is why some people lose their temper so often. They hope to obtain satisfaction for whatever is vexing them, but never fully get that satisfaction when they blow off steam. LIke an addict though, they keep trying to get full satisfaction so they lose their anger over and over.
I am a true believer that with many things in life, anger is not the only legitimate emotion out there. Sometimes problems do cause us to get angry. Other times when things are not totally correct, it is an opportunity for new things to arrive- inventions have happened because people have found themselves faced with a dilemma. Sometimes when faced with a challenge, people find new vehicles for working together and supporting one another. Anger is a legitimate response, but not all of the time.
I also believe that sometimes, a bit of good news helps ease raised emotions. Television newscasts use this method all of the time. They spend 55 minutes of their news on serious subjects but will always have a few minutes to show a good news story. Why? It makes accepting the bad news easier to take. In the midst of a disagreement with someone, if someone is angry with me, and I get angry with them, emotions intensify. However, if seomeone is angry with me and I respond by listening to their argument carefully, acknowledging the other person's upset, and pointing out ways we can work together, then emotions remain on an even keel or at least don't increase. A bit of good news can ease the soul. Blessings.
